strava loves me not

September 24, 2012

I’ve said it before, I love and hate Strava, as I love and hate myself.

Today, we hates it. Good cloud cover, intermittent drizzle, so I went long (for me), and routed myself to get a couple good warm up climbs before I went for the Strava PR on Clarks for my big finish. I realize my Clarks PR will be minutes slower than some of your Clarks PRs. It’s not a contest.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Okay, it’s always a contest, but it’s not a contest I’m in any danger of winning. That’s why I pursue PRs instead of KOMs. I’m a realist.

So anyway. I hit the base of Clarks from the west, which gives me a nice launching pad, and I stay safely in the Serena zone for the first quarter mile. But the higher I got the more painful it got, and I passed right through the Serena zone, barely noticed the Monica Seles Zone, spent a few minutes in the Maria Sharapova zone, and did the last half mile squarely in the Azarenka zone. I think a badger tried to mate with my leg because of the sounds I was making, but I couldn’t see or feel anything, so it’s hard to say for sure.

I finally get to the garage, I save and upload my ride to Strava, and scroll frantically, looking desperately for the cute little PR symbol.

And Strava acts like I never rode Clarks. I mean, the route map clearly shows I rode Clarks, but Strava shows no Clarks segment.

The other day, I crashed for the second time trying to PR Upper Anne’s, losing my glasses, all the skin on my right knee, and wasting 20 minutes in the Sharapova zone. This is so much worse.

Kaaaaaaahhhhhhnnnnnnnnn!

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6 Responses to “strava loves me not”

  1. Rob (Dug's brother) Says:

    Honey Badger luvs Dug’s leg….

  2. kanyonkris Says:

    Methastravadone, stat!

  3. bikemike Says:

    Strava is Russian for, “fat chance lard butt”. Hey, i’m just translating.

  4. mark Says:

    Since you approached from the west, you may not have started on the segment you are looking for. Check the hidden segments for the bridge to sign segment. I think the “main” Clark’s segment on strava starts lower than the bridge.

  5. Anonymous Says:

    Strava? Why do you do that? I like to keep my many, many personal failures buried as deep and dark as possible. That way I can lie convincingly about my weakness.

  6. Rick S. Says:

    Be careful with all that grunting on Clarks. The Chupacabra hangs out around there. I would know.


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