September 12, 2008
So this morning when I went into the bathroom and sat down, I noticed something that I had, er, never noticed before.
But before I get to what I noticed in the bathroom, I just noticed that I just started a sentence with “So.” I’ve been told that starting a sentence with “so” is a Utah thing, but like most things that people categorize as a “Utah thing,” I don’t believe it. I even had one guy from Florida (who, by the way, turned out to be CRAZY) object to the use, and tell me it was not just a Utah thing, but was also condescending and rude. Well. Condescending AND rude. The RUDE puts it over the top I guess. Anyway. Here’s what the Grammourpous has to say about it:
“You must not start a sentence with a conjunction” has been the mantra of many an exasperated English teacher, especially since the oiks [I have NO idea what an “oik” is] started getting state education. Any pupil brave, daft or naive enough to raise a hand and ask “Why?” would probably have received some Kafkaesque explanation along the lines of “Because it is said.”
So now we’re all grown up, we’ll ask again – why? The honest answer is that there is no reason. It’s just an arbitrary rule that’s been passed through the ages. But all language is arbitrary, isn’t it? Words and letters are but abstract concepts, the understanding of which can only come through the education of rules.
As usual with these issues, the argument is between the way English is used and the way it is “supposed to be”. Sometimes a full stop is required to drive home a sentence or give a meaningful pause. And an afterthought like this one gets more impact when it’s a sentence rather than a conjoined clause. So when someone tells you not to start a sentence with a conjunction, say: “But I’ve already done it.”
Okay? OKAY?! So GET OFF MY BACK!
Oh, right, you weren’t the ones giving me crap. Nevermind.
So, when I sat down in the bathroom, I noticed the tag on my shorts. Lately I’ve been going to Costco about once a month to get their tortillas, which are better than normal grocery store tortillas by a factor of about a gazillion. But once I’m in Costco, I get distracted by everything else they have there, like lawnmowers and battery chargers and big screen TVs.
In particular, I’ve been walking past big tables covered with plaid cargo shorts, which are my second or third favorite things in the world. And they are only TWELVE DOLLARS!
So, I have about 10 pair of them now, one for every month I go to Costco to buy tortillas.
Today I noticed the tag: “Made In Bangladesh.”
Is that a bad thing? Or am I helping their economy by wearing their plaid shorts? And do they wear plaid shorts in Bangladesh, or do they just make them for us?
These are some of my thoughts.