words are funny (or not)
November 17, 2008
Words are funny. Well, not ALL words. Some are totally NOT funny.
Like, say, the word “group” isn’t funny. Wait, I take that back, remember when Fezzik says “I’ve been specializing in “grwoops,” fighting local gangs for charity, that sort of thing?” THAT was funny.
So I guess ALL words CAN be funny. Other words are funny just because. “Poop” for example.
I find some words too horrible to say out loud. For example, I HATE the word “ointment.” Is there an uglier, ickier, grossser word in the English language?
Well, yes, yes there is. That word is “nostril.”
The only way you could make that worse would be to say “I need to put some OINTMENT on my NOSTRIL.” That would be worse.
Kim hates the word “moisture,” although, me, not so much. But, I can see her point.
Some words are a pleasure to say. “Syphilis.” Just rolls off the tongue. “I’ve got syphilis.” Okay, now it’s not as nice, but if you just SAY the word, then it’s nice, isn’t it?
Some words POP. Like “onomatopoeia.” I LOVE that word. Or “synecdoche.” Why do you spose words you learned as an English Lit major are so wonderful to say? “Synecdoche.” Who cares what it means, it just POPS.
Some words are HARD to say. I mean, there’s the obvious ones, like “nuclear.” That one is IMPOSSIBLE. But what about “viralent.” I mean “virilent.” Wait, no, I mean “VIRULENT.” See? And I can go back and EDIT.
Some words I hate just because of what they mean to me, like “inappropriate.” For some reason I used to (never anymore) get that said to me a LOT. I’ve NEVER liked that word.
I love words that get mispronounced ALL the time. It’s like a little test. Quick, say “hyperbole.” Or “mischievous” (only 3 syllables). Or “realtor” (clue–there’s only ONE a). I’ve heard an older gentleman at church use the non-word “emacitated” on 3 separate occasions now. Do you think I should tell him?
Or, or, there is too much, lemme sum up. My favorite is “Strategery.” Okay, I’ve never heard a real person say that, but it’s awesome.
Other words are just puzzling. Like “hermaphrodite.” For the longest time I thought that was the Greek goddess of sex. Awkward.