you guys are the best
January 6, 2009
You guys totally didn’t need to get me anything for Christmas. I mean, I didn’t get YOU anything.
I came home from skiing Saturday, and found a little package on my doorstep. The package contained this book and accessory:
What, did you all 6 of you get together on the web and send this to me? Well, THANKS.
I stayed up for a few hours the other night reading, sitting on the magic toilet, since I think it’s appropriate that this book be read while sitting on a toilet (wait, YOU didn’t already read this while sitting on the toilet, right? Oh, let’s not go there, please), and I LOVE it. This woman thinks like I do.
Take a look:
“In 2007, readers of the British Medical Journal were asked to vote for the biggest medical milestone of the last two hundred years. Their choice was wide: antibiotics, penicillin, anesthesia, the Pill. They chose Sanitation [modernly defined as the proper disposal of human excreta]. In poorly sewered nineteenth-century London, one child out of two died early. After toilets, sewers, and hand-washing with soap became normal, child mortality dropped by a fifth, the largest reduction in child mortality in British history.”
See? SEE? It’s a big deal. And I am not alone. Gandhi, after spending his life trying to rid India of its colonial rulers, said “Sanitation is more important than independence.” Rudyard Kipling said that drains are “a great and glorious thing, and I study ’em and write about ’em when I can.”
Yay toilets. Clean ones, anyway. Did you know that 2.6 BILLION people don’t have toilets? That is, they shit in the street, the bushes, wherever. Nobles used to shit in the hallways on the floor in Versailles. Ick.
Oh, and the accessory included in the gift, that “plunger.” Thanks for that too. What, the book didn’t cost quite enough, you had an extra dollar? Here’s where the “plunger” goes:
I put it by the magic toilet, since the magic toilet rarely needs plunging, and I’m pretty sure this “plunger” would just make a mess, and not actually plunge anything. I need to get a sign on it that reads “NOT A REAL PLUNGER-DO NOT USE!”
But really, it’s the thought (er, book) that counts. Thanks.