it’s like wildebeests

January 13, 2009

While we were driving back from Mexico, we spent lots of time on two lane mountain roads. Every few miles the road would present a passing lane, where those in a hurry could get around those who were not.

Each time we would come upon a passing lane, I would try to remember, where have I seen that kind of behavior before? I wondered aloud, I scratched my head, I racked my brain. (Don’t talk to me about “wrack vs rack.” What, you think I didn’t look that up? You think I’d give you that kind of ammunition? This ain’t my first rodeo, sister.)

Finally, it hit me: people rushing to get around slower cars in the passing lane on mountain roads are like backcountry skiers trying to pass a slower group on their way to the untracked powder.

Ha ha ha. No, really.

But MORE than like backcountry skiers, mountain road passing lane passers remind me of Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom. Specifically, wildebeests, trying to get out of a steeply-banked, croc-infested river.

I don’t know why knowing that is comforting to me.

People who get let into a crowded freeway by a neighborly driver only to then close out other mergers are like a hearts player who dumps his last high spade and then immediately starts smoking the queen.

And mountain road passing lane passers are like crazy wildebeests chased out of a river by hungry crocodiles.

And you thought all I did was talk about poop.

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8 Responses to “it’s like wildebeests”

  1. mark Says:

    Wildebeasts poop. So you still haven’t strayed off topic.

  2. hoyacougar Says:

    so, the hungry crocodiles are the slow-moving vehicles? like terrified tourists trying to get back to the east entrance of zion that refuse to use the pull-offs for the crazy wildebeast(s) on their bumper?

  3. bikemike Says:

    poop!

  4. dug Says:

    ahoy hoy. hee hee.

    hmm. i guess that’s right. the crocodiles entered the metaphor (wait, i think this is a simile) late in the game. originally i was just thinking that the drivers scrambling desperately to get around slower traffic were like the wildebeests getting out of the river. i added the crocodiles for color.

    yes. YES, now that you say it, the crocodiles ARE the slow traffic, trying to hold back the fast traffic.

    thanks for stopping by.

  5. KanyonKris Says:

    Marlin Perkins: “And now Jim is moving in for a closer look. An F-150 is making an aggressive move into the passing lane. Jim didn’t see the truck, OOH, he’s hit! But the local carrion fowl will get a fine meal today. It’s all part of the Wild Kingdom.”

    (Que theme music)

  6. steveA Says:

    lets hear it for the fast wildebeasts that stomp on the inconsiderate slow crocs! Wait, crocs are Australian, while crocodiles are african, right?

  7. forgingahead Says:

    Nice metaphor! I’ll keep it in mind next time I blow by some slow wildebeasts going up a hill.

  8. Bro-Ken Says:

    Dug, I gotta admit, I feel a little creepy coming out of the closet as a blog stalker, but I have followed your blog daily for almost a year now. I never comment or anything, just read, which is a little more weird, but there you have it. My brother-in-law got me hooked on reading your blog. He’s into biking too and I think met you…..nevermind. Not important. Anyway, I recently started a blog of my own and I was wondering if you minded me throwing your link up on my blogroll. A couple of people have thrown up my link without asking and I can’t make up my mind if I think it is creepy or not, so I wanted to ask. You don’t have to reciprocate, I just find your blog pretty entertaining and wanted to share with my readers.
    Keep up the blog, it is great.


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