as big as my head
January 29, 2009
So we’re sitting in the daily dev meeting this morning, and out of the blue, big boss man brings in two big boxes of donuts. This has never happened before, and pretty much makes up for the bathroom and the fridge.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Okay, maybe not, but still, TWO big boxes of donuts. And not crappy donuts either, good stuff, and much variety.
Now, I’m not a huge (hm) donut guy. I don’t like glazed, I don’t like maple bars, I don’t go nuts for donuts.
But I love a couple of donut items. For example, I love the Dunford Chocolate donut that is so thick it’s a meal. In fact, it’s my daily breakfast meal. Yum.
And I love (LOVE) the raspberry fritters at Daylight Donuts in Pleasant Grove. When I used to live in PG, I would do the drive up and say “Got any warm fritters?” If they had em, I’d buy three. They MELT in your mouth. If they didn’t have em, I would just drive on through. “Nothing for me today thanks.”
So the boxes of donuts in today’s meeting–after everybody had taken their fill, I looked to see what was left, and, in fact, there was an apple fritter still in the box. I like fritters. So I took this one back to my desk.
But the more I look at it, the less I want to eat it. For one thing, it reminds me of the huge mama spider in Arachnophobia. HUGE. And crispy. And dark. But mostly HUGE. I’m a little nervous.
Take a look:
Okay, by itself, I can see how you might think it’s not so big. Trust me, it’s big.
That’s a ONE POUND bag of sunflower seeds. How many calories do you think the fritter is?
Okay, here, this is a super deluxe triple ply roll of Charmin.
And a SIXTY FOUR ounce bottle of water:
For a true comparison, take a look at this. It’s big:
Wait, I have a pretty big head, so that’s not a good example of “It’s as big as my HEAD!”
Here is a volunteer with a normal sized head:
Can you imagine? So you eat this thing, and now you have something as big as your head in your stomach.
On the other hand, you know that by the end of the day, I’ll have eaten it. The only way to stop myself is to mar it’s deliciousness somehow. Rachelle pours water on extra cookies she doesn’t want to eat.
There, I just poured water on it.
Nope, that didn’t work, I still want it.
I’m gonna have to pee on it.