apologia pro vita sua
March 9, 2009
Many winters ago, Kim and I went to New York City to visit my brother, who lived in Manhattan at the time. While there, naturally, we ate at some pretty nice restaurants, including one just off Central Park, where Patrick Stewart sat in the next booth.
In one restaurant, I forget the name, as I do ALL names, Liz went into the bathroom, came out and said “you guys have GOT to go see the bathrooms.”
So I went to the mens room, and yes, it was spectacular. The urinal was a wall to wall, floor to ceiling waterfall. Very cool. I don’t even know what was cool in the womens, since I didn’t go in, and they don’t have urinals. But the women seemed quite impressed with it.
A few weeks ago Kim and I ate with her dad and some friends in Park City, at a fairly upscale steak house. The bathroom had a picture of Sharon Stone, naked except for her well placed hands and some mens briefs.
And Saturday we went to the Tower theater in Salt Lake City to catch Revolutionary Road. The bathrooms were down a super narrow, creaky stairway, and seemed positively dungeon like. I felt like the Gimp was going to jump out of a box.
Why do I tell you all this?
Because bathrooms are INTERESTING. I mean, we all use them, multiple times a day. Some are spectacular, some are unbelievably gross, some are mundane. But they’re worth talking about. Like, if someone took a tour of all the major cathedrals in Europe, and published a book about the journey, but only talked about the bathrooms, I would BUY that book.
You know how in Mont Saint Michel and Chartres, Henry Adams tried to use the architectural differences and similarities between those two famous cathedrals as a metaphor for medieval society and Catholic theology? This bathroom book would be kind of like that.
I’m just saying.
Here’s a pic from the bathroom at the Tower theater:
This is a public building, one which often contains people. And I don’t think that’s just randomly applied spray paint, because the neighboring fixture has the same, um, ickiness.
See how interesting? Okay, maybe you wouldn’t get back to your seat in the theater and say “you guys have GOT to go see the bathrooms–I think there is a living fungus on the fixtures.”
But I would.