is that everything?

June 19, 2009

I am a forgetful person. If you tell me your name to my face, and then ask me to tell you your name, I will have forgotten. It’s not that I’m not listening. Really. Okay, maybe.

But I’m still a forgetful person. I forget pretty much everything. That doesn’t mean everything is lost forever, it just means I can’t remember it RIGHT NOW. Eventually I’ll remember it. That’s how this blog stays in business.

But still. Having someone say to me “Is that everything” is not really any help. Especially when that someone is the clerk at my local Chevron, and all I’m buying is a coke. And maybe some Milk Duds.

Hi, here is the coke I’m buying, and my Milk Duds.

Is that everything?

Really? Are we just making conversation now? Do you SEE anything else on the counter? Do I LOOK chatty?

I mean, at Harmons at least they say “Do you need any ice or stamps today?” I like that. Very specific, very helpful, even if I pretty much NEVER need ice or stamps. I wish they would say “would you like any gelato with that?”

But saying “Is that everything” does nothing for me. You might as well say “popsicle.” As if I’ve been hypnotized, and “popsicle” is the magic word.

It’s not the magic word. And neither is “Is that everything.”

22 Responses to “is that everything?”

  1. Rick S Says:

    I think they should do some targetted cross-selling. If you buy Milk Duds, they should be able to tell you what other items are most commonly purchased with Milk Duds and make that recommendation. I can tell the answer….it’s tampons. Tampons are almost always purchased with Milk Duds.

  2. dug Says:

    rick, i would lash out with anger, cry, maybe try to find a picture of you in a compromised position.

    but i can’t. i’m laughing too hard at your comment.

  3. Rick S Says:

    Now you know how the rest of feel EVERY day after we read your posts.

  4. bikemike Says:

    i always take Vic Mackey, from The Shield, in with me, so, if they ask me, “is that everything”, Vic jumps across the counter and punches ’em out.

    sometimes i just say “no”.

  5. KanyonKris Says:

    I’ve always ignored that throw-away phrase, but dug, you have again opened my eyes to the magic (annoyance?) of the mundane.

    Perhaps next time I’ll reply with:

    “Do you have a T-14 hyperdrive generator?”

    or less geeky:

    “Oh, yes, a jug of antifreeze to mix with my diet coke.”

  6. grizzly adam Says:

    Somehow the real world needs to be more like the internet. Like Rick said, when I look at a book at Amazon I can see related books and what customers who purchased my book also bought.

    How cool would it be to have a screen just floating in the air (you know, like Minority Report) that displays what others who also bought milk duds purchased.
    So when I toss my candy up on the counter I see that tampons are on sale, and so obviously, I would purchase them.

    Really it all comes down to life being more like Minority Report. Personalized ads, chips embedded in our brains and eyes and some half people that live in a pool and can tell the future.

    • grizzly adam Says:

      And yes, that’s everything.

    • dug Says:

      adam, i have a minority report rant that i once sent to roger ebert. he never responded. maybe i’ll rant here sometime.

      not that i didn’t enjoy the movie. but like most time travel movies and mind control movies, it has a fatal flaw.

      i just can’t remember what it is right now.

      • Grizzly Adam Says:

        Well there was the flaw of punishing people for crimes they did not commit. But I think you maybe had another one in mind. I have not watched the film for a long while, but I felt the same way. Great movie to watch, but somehow left me irritated. And now, I can’t remember why either.

        Maybe next time we are skinning up Argenta we will both remember, and then we can rant about it while we climb 4k of powder.

    • KanyonKris Says:

      Would I be able to see that it was Rick who bought the Milk Duds and tampons?

    • Eber Says:

      The bad thing about the Minority Report scenario is that next time Rick steps up to the cashier the nice lady comes on screen and says “Hello Mr. Sunderlage, I hope you enjoyed your Spring Fresh tampons.” It’d be great comic relief for those of us standing in line behind, but no so much for Rick.

  7. Jeff Says:

    I think you’re supposed to follow “is that everything?” with “and I’d like it all for free.” Can’t hurt to try.

  8. linfin Says:

    Do you know that no matter what a man buys with his tampons they’re still making fun of you at the check out counter when you leave? On the actual topic of the day, anyway, if I don’t make a list of what to get, I will forget the one thing I go in the store for, get a bunch of other things I don’t need, and no helpful cashier phrases will help me remember what I’ve forgotten til after I am almost home.

  9. savvymama Says:

    Dug, I’ve wondered the same thing! Usually I
    just have a diet coke, and they say “Is that
    everything?” It usually happens at Chevron–
    do you think that’s part of their training?

  10. ricky Says:

    sounds like the chevron sales guys go to the same ½-baked sales training seminars the maceys sales guys go to. seriously, they’re not even thinking about what they’re asking. at maceys they ask, “did you find everything ok?” do I ever find everything ok? that’s easy, uh, no. even when i tell them no they say, “great great your total comes to $62.95.” they do the up-sell 50%. they take the first step but don’t take the second as rick suggests. they want you to take the second step. “is that everything?” wink wink nod nod. no coffee for them. wait, maybe these guys are on to something. hey rick, next time you take a po for sitecatalyst ask your contact, “is that everything?” if that doesn’t work, throw in a free bundle of milkduds and tampons.


  11. I’m right there with you on this one.


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