hugs i love you

March 26, 2010

Blogging is such a racket. Someday I’ll make millions off of blogging.

But if I’m going to be rich and famous, I’ve got to be visible. Regular. Active.

Mark used to have a blogroll that just went on and on, but he decided to punish people who didn’t publish regularly by not only listing the blogs in his blogroll by “most recently published” order, but by limiting the visible blogs to the ten most recently published.

Today I was checking out Mark’s blog (not updated since Wednesday, by the way), and I noticed that I was on the verge of disappearing from his list.

I admit it, I panicked. Nobody wants to be invisible. Well, almost nobody.

And, so, here you go, my question of the day, the week, hell, the question that has been plaguing me since my daughter turned into a teenager, and which I have listed in the “blog topics” file on my phone as “hugs i love you.”

When you were kids, did you hug every friend you ever ran into like you hadn’t seen them since they went to prison, and say goodbye to every friend you ever parted from as if they were going into the army?

It weirds me out.


22 Responses to “hugs i love you”

  1. Alex/Watcher Says:

    I don’t ever remember hugging any non-family member when I was younger than about 16 or 17, nor do I recall any desire to do so.

    Between about ages 16/17 and 24/25 or so, I expanded my hugging circle to include females with whom I had some hope or aspiration- however faint- of getting it on.

    Between about ages 25 and maybe 35, I shifted my Hugging Universe to include females with whom I might have tried to get it on were I not in a monogamous relationship.

    And since then, I hardly ever initiate hugs with non-family members, though I do hug back. Great question, BTW.

    (Disturbingly, my new employer has a widespread trend of colleagues hugging, even same sex colleagues. May be a deal-breaker for me…)

    • dug Says:

      ohh, alex, i gotta say, that if i were in a position at a company to choose which company my company were to pay for the kinds of services your company offers (speaking of rackets), knowing the hugging culture at your company might be the thing that makes the decision for me.

      my head hurts.

    • mark Says:

      Alex, your company is just weird.

      When I was a missionary, it was common for missionaries to hug one another in the way dug describes. In hindsight, clean cut men that live together and often hug one another in public are going to have a hard time getting people to believe that they’re platonic roommates. Just sayin’.

  2. Alex,

    I am going to hug you so tight the next time I see you.

  3. fish Says:


  4. Rob (dug's brother) Says:


  5. bob Says:

    Let’s HUG, I’ll hug anything that moves!

  6. chtrich Says:

    Brothers gotta hug!

  7. bikemike Says:

    nope, no huggies for me.

  8. Jonnie J Says:

    Dug – I think one of the first times I met you was in the Suncrest Market. Remember that great place? I patted you on the shoulder and you looked at me and said “I am not a touchy kind of person”. So then I gave you the side hug… just because I like to irritate people. Now I see the error of my ways. I’m surprised we are still friends. Or are we?

  9. rabidrunner Says:

    This gave me all sorts of post-traumatic stress from my high school days. High school is weird.

  10. Rachel Says:

    But, really, you’re just in this for internet hugs, aren’t you?

    Do you [read dug’s blog] like you haven’t seen it since [you] went to prison, and [cry at the end of every post] as if [the blog] were going into the army?

  11. mtb w Says:

    Let’s all give a group hug to Dug and Watcher!!

    No? OK, I’m not that into hugs either, group or otherwise. When I was a teenager, the only people I wanted hugs from were cute girls. But the time I got into my 30s, my family mysteriously started to occasionally hug – very awkward! After a decade of it, I now occasionally hug back a male friend or family member (mainly a pat on the back with little to no touching), but only if initiated by the other guy. Is it the PC/”in thing” to hug other guys? Women? No problem hugging there. In general, though, hugging is more of a girl/girl thing (wait, is there something to this?).

  12. Kendra Says:

    Hi Dug, I read your blog, and appreciate your comment on my ASD on my blog. I would love to compare notes with your wife sometime. As far as the hugging thing, it is totally a girl thing, not all girls, but the majority. They see each other they hug, they say good-bye they hug, they say good-bye again and hug again, the hugging never ends!

  13. cubsfarr Says:

    This means that our hugs have been truly special, right?

  14. Carrie Says:

    I find this so funny. Last year when my then freshman son was playing football, I spent more time watching the kids in the stands hug each other than I did watching him play. It was fascinating. It wasn’t like that when I went to HS.

    I’m not allowed to hug my son(heaven forbid!)but he has no problem hugging his friends male and female!

  15. Beth Says:

    I live in the Southeast, and hugging is big down here, especially with the teen-aged girls- They hug everyone!! I don’t mind the hugs, it’s the corresponding high-pitched squeal that goes with it that bugs me. My 16 year old son hugs girls and his aunt, but shakes hands with the men and boys… All the boys shake hands; between the hugs and the hand shaking, it takes fifteen minutes for two families to hello or good-bye (the ritual is repeated on both ends of the visit.)

    We didn’t do this when I was a teenager… While it is nice to see him greet his friends or their parents with such respect, I do wonder where he learned it!

  16. CB Says:

    All of this talk about hugging reminds me of a book my sis-in-law gave us on how to have “the talk” with your children. The author suggested you teach your kids about having sex when they’re age appropriate (whatever that is nowadays) and to describe the act as a “big, special hug”.
    I still snicker when people talk about hugs. Yep… I’m childish.

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