sometimes i hate nature

June 14, 2010

I rode Jamie’s trail the other day (I guess they officially call it Rush, but it’ll always be Jamie’s trail to me), the best trail in the Corner Canyon network, a working downhill if there ever was one.

They are doing some work on the trail, so it was taped off at the top, but seeing as I’m as local as you can get without actually LIVING on the trail, I know about ten ways to get onto the trail (without actually ducking the tape, which I didn’t do since there were official looking people milling around at the top).

But here’s a downside to poaching a closed trail–you’re likely to be the first one down it that day.

Which normally isn’t a problem. Except during silkworm season.

When you’re the first one down a trail during silkworm season, then there’s nobody in front of you to knock the ten kazillion silkworms dangling over the trail out of the way. So you and your face end up doing yeomen’s work. Very very icky yeomen’s work.

In fact, it reminded me of that scene from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, the worst of the three original Jones movies that was also light years better (if I could measure movie quality in terms of distance for a moment) than the last Indiana Jones movie.

You know the scene? The one where they walk through a hallway full of centipedes, beetles, and other creepy crawlies? I can’t find that scene on YouTube. Sometimes I hate Youtube.

Anyway. It was like that.

You can’t tell much from these pictures, but when I finally emerged from phase two of Jamie’s trail onto the Goat, I felt like I had eaten about ten worms, and had about 100 more stuck in my eyes, ears, and helmet.

worms one circles

Even Orange got in on the action:

worms four circles

At least I’m gettin my protein. I pulled about a dozen out of my helmet, and washed about a dozen more out of my hair in the shower.

Ick. Sometimes I hate nature.


19 Responses to “sometimes i hate nature”

  1. Rob (dug's brother) Says:

    “Hey, check out my package”

  2. Rachel Says:

    Ick for you was pure delight for my 5-year old son, who found one the other day and had me take several pictures of it. They’re kinda cute, don’t you think? When they scrunch themselves all up in a camel’s hump to move forward a centimeter?

  3. Rick S. Says:

    There has to be a reason those things are hanging down from the trees trying to attach to things. Parasites. I’m wearing ear plugs next ride.

  4. bob Says:


    • dug Says:

      yes, that was another one. i found that clip in german:

      the clip of the bugs coming OUT of the ear are good too.

  5. Anonymous Says:

    “Hey check out my package”…doug is finding interesting things to do with the case of toilet paper left on his porch

  6. BM Says:

    This is one of those times when nature feels the same way about you.

    • dug Says:

      nice. I read a short story once about all plant life on a planet evolving to kill humans. maybe it’s like that.

      or maybe it’s just these damn silkworms.

  7. eber Says:

    Last week one of those little buggers latched onto my eyeball. No joke. I tried to pull it out and felt it tighten it’s mother lovin grip on my cornea. I blame the infidels for this plague o silkworms.

  8. tibiker Says:

    That’s so funny, I went up there last week to see how things were progressing and I poached the trail too. At the end of the last section I honestly had the SAME EXACT THOUGHT. This is the disadvantage of having the trail closed, the little buggers were everywhere, and no one to knock them off before I rode through. I was still finding them when I got home.

  9. bikemike Says:

    if you’re comparing quality in light years, i think you would be talking “time”, not “distance”.
    i’ve got a call into stephen hawking, just for verification. i’ll be back in touch. i could be wrong…or not.

    • KanyonKris Says:

      dug’s usage is correct. A light year is the distance light travels in a year.

      • bikemike Says:

        well, of course. although i was thinking more along the linear line of the space time continuim and the comparative juxtaposition in relation to crappy harrison ford/indiana jones movies. my bad.

  10. Anonymous Says:

    Can’t say that has ever happened up here but we are suffering from an infestation of Mayflies. They are so thick it is like a fog.

    P.S. When i first saw the pic, I thought those black circles were part of the design. Thank god I’m pretty…..

  11. MOCougFan Says:

    Gross. Nothing more to say than gross. About the worms that is.

    I also think it’s funny that I noticed your not wearing plaid and that Kenny’s Daisy Dukes are longer than normal in FC’s post.

    I really wish I didn’t notice.

  12. chad Says:

    My wife agrees with your distaste for nature after this weekend. She rode her first century on sunday and did not see a smooshed road-kill possum until it was too late to swerve. 20 miles later she flatted and we pulled an inch of possum bone out of her tire. We also, unfortunately, had to hose down her bike. I think she would have chosen silkworms.

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