wait, what?

October 5, 2010

Imagine you’re me for a minute.

I’ll wait.

Okay, now that you’re me, imagine having this instant message conversation with your wife while you’re at work:

Kim:  Maddy just ran into your bike. I’ll go see if it just got pushed against the railing or what.

Sent at 4:17 PM on Tuesday

Me:  wait, what?

Sent at 4:19 PM on Tuesday

Kim:  Um.. I’m sure she doesn’t want me to tell you. I’m in the den, obviously, and I heard it. She pulled in to the garage where the Subaru usually is and I think she just pushed it against the railing. There is a little squeak when it rolls forward so maybe she pushed the brake lever…? Nothing visible.

This is awkward but I have to go now.

Sent at 4:20 PM on Tuesday

Sound of me punching myself in the face and smashing my head against my desk.

[Epilogue: The bike is fine–Just knocked over. All good. On the other hand, I had a brain aneurysm, so the bike is no good to me anymore.]

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24 Responses to “wait, what?”

  1. Flying Ute Says:

    Bro. You outa park your bike in my Garage!!! It’ll be safe there!

  2. Derron Says:

    Whew…I just about had an aneurysm as well. Glad to hear that Orangesicle is OK.

  3. ricky Says:

    what about maddy? is she ok? i can’t believe the orangecycle jumped out in front of her like that.

  4. KanyonKris Says:

    I pretended too well and let out an audible gasp.

    1 concussion + 1 aneurysm = not the best 2 days for your brain. And children wonder why their parents get weird.

  5. bikemike Says:

    you should probably start wearing your helmet at work. oh, and maybe keep various bottles of medication close at hand.

  6. Jeff Says:

    At least it was at 4:20. Can you imagine if that conversation had happened at 9:20? The day would be shot – I would have to go home at that point.

  7. mtb w Says:

    Uh, 4:20 isn’t supposed to sound like that. And, if the bike is no good to you anymore, I don’t think you’ll have a problem finding it a new home.

  8. Steve The BigRide Says:

    Would you have freaked if she dented your car?

  9. mark Says:

    When my daughter is old enough to drive, we’ll be giving her away so that the third bay can remain dedicated to bikes.

    • bikemike Says:

      Mark, i’ll bet you could go to any reputable bike shop and trade her for a good mechanic/support crew. don’t throw that kind of leverage away.

      • mark Says:

        When you put it that way, it sounds icky. Guess I’ll keep her and just store the bikes in her bedroom. Biggest room in the house, so there’s plenty of space.

  10. Brandon Says:

    Orange needs one of those “Pope Mobiles” to keep it protected from danger.

  11. Mark Says:

    No worries, your bike is steel, it can take a beating and ride away unscathed. If it can survive P2P it should be ok after getting knocked over in your garage – right?

    • dug Says:

      it isn’t the “knocked over” i’m worried about. i ghost ride the sucker all the time.

      it’s the “pinned between the bumper of the car and the garage stairs railing” thing i’m worried about.

  12. rich Says:

    Wait….people put cars in their garages?

    • HeidiR Says:

      There’s a comment in there that fits perfectly in “wait, what?” or at least that was my reaction – “You ice with frosting, and you frost with icing.”
      Oh, yes, it’s much clearer now……

  13. Andrew Says:

    Same thing happened to me a number of years ago. Just prior to going on my mission I’d purchased a brand-new Specialized and put it in the attic for safe keeping. A few months in-country I get a letter from home where my dear mother casually adds, “…Dad’s fine after crashing your bike…” but says nothing more.

    Because post took several weeks to get to and from the States, and my parents thought it was a funny joke, I didn’t know the truth for almost 3 months.

    The bike had never been moved and was still in the attic.

  14. bikemike Says:

    and you’ll no doubt pass that cruelty onto your kids one day. ahh, the circle of life.

  15. JB Says:

    I guess the girls in your house don’t have the best history with bikes and garages, but they make for hilarious stories.

  16. Shelle Says:

    I love that it got “awkward.” So funny.


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