that’s all

March 25, 2011

If you owned or operated a quickie oil change facility, what do you think you could offer me to ensure that I go nowhere else ever to get my oil changed (besides 90% discounts)?

I’ll tell you what it’s NOT.

It’s not popcorn:

oil change popcorn

Do you think I can’t see your hands? You change oil for a living. I don’t want your popcorn.

I’ll tell you what else it’s NOT.

It’s not magazines like this:

oil change magazines

By the way, those were ALL the magazines in the waiting room. No Sports Illustrated. No Time. Not even Glamour. Just Bowhunting, Field & Stream, Motor Trend, and the always compelling Predator Magazine. Oh, and Highlights, probably brought in from a dentist’s office.


I’ll tell you what—if you want to ensure that I never even consider going somewhere else for my oil change, here’s what I want:

1. Free, easy wireless. Because then I won’t care what magazines you have. Because then I won’t care if it takes a long time to change my oil. And then I won’t even  notice that your employees and lots of little kids are handling a bin of public popcorn right next to me.

2. That’s all.


17 Responses to “that’s all”

  1. bikemike Says:

    did they not have a customer suggestion box? maybe you should suggest that, first.

  2. stevebpt Says:

    you buy the oil and filter, come to my house and i’ll do it for freeeeeeee!

    • dug Says:

      do you have wireless? will you let me sit in the family room and surf the internet while you do it for free?

      • stevebpt Says:

        we have wireless. you can come out to the garage and surf there. sometimes we have oily, buttery popcorn but diesel free.

  3. Jennebelle Says:

    Our Kal Tire has free popcorn too. Gross. And no wireless (but my optometrist does now, yay!)

  4. Jeff Says:

    They do have Highlights. You can’t go wrong with Goofus and Gallant.

  5. JB Says:

    I always bring my own book and stay in my nice clean car. I’ve never been inside the waiting area, they seem disgusting!

  6. Squirrelhead Says:

    I couldn’t agree more. I think that all businesses with a waiting room should have free wifi. That is what everyone wants while they are sitting there waiting for what seems like a lifetime. That popcorn looks nasty. I am sure it was stale too.

  7. KanyonKris Says:

    Yeah, Predator is lame. Everyone knows Modern Stalker is the bomb.

  8. Sara-no-h Says:

    I eat the popcorn.

    • steve Says:

      Me too. They don’t have to touch it, just scoop and pour. Hands free. Les Scwabb has pretty good popcorn. It ain’t theater stuff but it’s freeeeeee.

  9. Flyin' Ute Says:

    I have donated my “already read” outside magazine to more than one lame waiting room in my life.

    Hopefully I have improved the wait time of a few bored souls in the world.

    Just trying to help where I can.

  10. Brett Ringger Says:

    I don’t know; I think I have to disagrgee here. It is completely good to peruse the strange and wonderful ads and opinions in hobbies outside one’s own wheelhouse. The more niche and kooky, the better.

  11. CB Says:

    That looks like the Highland J-Lube…then again…maybe they all look alike? But I’m with you…nasty looking popcorn. The worst part for me is…I LOVE POPCORN. So talk about torture…there I sit w/o WiFi (great idea BTW) and I have to smell it cooking!

  12. Sara-no-h Says:

    Today I skipped the popcorn. There was a big German Shepherd in the waiting area crying for more. After the owner said, “No more popcorn for you,” I got nervous…

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